Growing Within - By Dr. Suma Rao

“The exact relationship between man and God - isn’t it like the relationship between the sun and the earth? The sun is billions of miles away but its warm rays finger the earth, and cover it with a green gladness. Isn’t it the same with God? Though physically distant, He is perceived as being intimately close, in one’s heart.” These were my thoughts as a fifteen year old student, sitting on the steps of the college building at Anantapur, watching the sun sink in the western sky.

My musings found an echo in God’s vast Love. That very day, Bhagavan called my father for an interview and He mentioned that I spent my time drawing pictures of God. He also remarked that Anantapur College had the Presence of God and that it would be perceived by those whose hearts were open to it.

Sri Sathya Sai with Faculty at Anantapur Campus

Growth is a way of life in the garden of God’s institutions. Here, an atmosphere is provided where students are exposed to one system and encouraged to forge an internal relationship with God. It is in this relationship that the seat of virtue lies. Virtue must emanate from the depth of one’s being and not be a superficial adoption of some actions. It involves soul searching and an honest attempt to change one’s pattern of thinking and actions. This act of internal change is possible only when one is able to see beyond the selfishness of everyday living. Only the presence of an enormous, selfless and all encompassing Love can motivate one to look beyond one’s own self and make a dedicated attempt at living a true and godly life.

In the world today, people are encouraged to meet their own desires and think only of themselves. This situation offers even less occasion for the practice of or belief in a life of virtue and goodness. Goodness is treated as a weakness. To counter this tide of trite living, what is needed is an experience of great love which will restore the dying belief in goodness.

The true practice of goodness necessitates certain conditions. Firstly, an abiding belief in God. Secondly, a perception of God’s love in a real and personal sense, and thirdly, a sincere attempt to align one’s living to one’s beliefs.

Belief in God is essential in order to create vision. The difference between a materialistic and a spiritual point of view is that of perspective. The materialistic point of view seeks tangible and concrete results. The belief in justice and fairness declines because the happenings in the short run are considered absolute in themselves. The ends become more important than the means. The randomness of experience and the uncertainty of existence create fear which arouses the survival instinct, forcing one to strive to achieve his desires even at the cost of other people’s happiness. Contrary to this, the spiritual perspective, because of its belief in God, perceives a sense of security in Him. It can afford the long-term view of life. It necessitates the consideration of ethical means to achieve holistic ends. It creates an attitude of patience and forbearance in the face of uncertainty and loss. This is the reason why belief in God is the cornerstone of a spiritual life.

Since human life is an amalgam of thoughts, emotions and actions, the experience of God and His Love needs to be real for us, in order to believe completely. This is one of the first lessons that Bhagavan’s students learn. This is however taught by the Great Master himself. Most students remember a time when they needed support, counsel or guidance and found it in Bhagavan’s words and discourses; dreams or interactions; directly or indirectly. It is this personal experience of Divinity that builds true confidence and courage in them. This I can attest, with many personal experiences. On one sunny morning, Bhagavan called my parents and sister for an interview and blessed them profusely. Soon after, my parents were involved in a serious automobile accident and suffered injuries. Bhagavan’s abundant love for us during this crucial time saw us through. Today we look back at that period of time and consider it the best of our experiences. Only God’s love can transmute a moment of sorrow into a moment of joy. The result of such an experience is an abiding belief that God is always with us even if we are not aware of it. 

Dr. Suma's parents - Prof. U.S.Rao and Smt. Sathyavati Rao with Sri Sathya Sai

The biggest miracle of God lies in the fact that He creates in us the desire to be worthy of His Love. This is perhaps the beginning of the practice of virtue. The contact with God’s simple, lucent and flooding Love awakens the need for light in one’s own life. We begin to pay heed to His words and try to align our living to the principles that He stands for. The process of changing one’s self is no simple task. It requires an awareness, constant effort and patience. Above all, it requires the catalyst of God’s grace. True change cannot occur on the physical level unless it is preceded by change in a higher dimension. Internal change shows in external behavior. The quality of life can be judged by the response an individual exhibits to life’s challenges and situations. A positive, consistent and enduring response is perhaps what we call virtue. Bhagavan gives the example of the sandalwood tree, which lends fragrance even to the axe that chops it. Self-sacrifice of this kind can be found only in saints who have their source of strength in God’s abundant love. Considering that Life has been given to us to conduct experiments of this sort, wherein skills and attitudes of higher living have to be acquired, it is necessary for each person to understand and practice the principles of true and higher living to the best of his ability. 

The desire to live in a more meaningful way itself begins to draw circumstances in our life which reveal to us our particular weaknesses, thinking patterns, and unquestioned beliefs. The inner view of life coupled with the belief in God forces us to take responsibility for change in our attitudes and actions. This process of objectively looking at our own faults is possible only because of the Grace of God. This is because it is a natural instinct for every person to gloss over one’s own faults and blame others for problems in life. Of all battles, the battle with the little self - the ego - is perhaps the most difficult one. Its insidious arguments and its ability to cloud perception, which encourages us to pursue smaller and selfish goals, make it a formidable enemy. It is in this battle that God’s help is most crucial. The presence of God is felt most when the pain of facing oneself overpowers purpose and intention, when the goal seems distanced, and everything is doubted. It is at such times that Bhagavan reaches out to us and restores our belief. 

In my heart,

I know You are there, always.

I know You love me, truly.

I know You never abandon.

Still I wrestle with myself…..

Why don’t I depend on You fully?

Stretch Your hand and reach me,

Across this abyss of self-created pain.

Bridge this distance of ignorance.

Lord, let me know with finality

That You are all that I have or ever need……

And in that truth, help me live with dignity.

Dr. Suma with Sri Sathya Sai at Prasanthi Nilayam

Bhagavan has given me life and love. He has graced me with ability and education. But the greatest gift that He has bestowed on me is the desire to live a higher life. In interviews and dreams He has guided me and guarded me against pitfalls in myself. This constant attention proves to me without doubt His Omnipotence and Omniscience. A lifetime may not be enough to achieve the exalted goal of higher living. However the journey has begun and the companionship of God makes everything worthwhile and beautiful.

- Dr. Suma Rao

Student (1987-1991) and Currently, Associate Professor and Head of the Department

Faculty of Management and Commerce

Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning

Source: Vidyagiri: Divine Vision (2006)