It was the fag end of my stay in Brindavan as a final year student of the Under Graduate Programme in Science. As a student of Brindavan campus, I was taking care of a patient who was residing at the Ashram in the guesthouse. My primary duty was to give him food, and to take him for a stroll in the evening or at times in the early morning. Along with me two more junior students doing their second year Under Graduation were also sharing the same type of work with me.
Whenever Bhagavan comes to Brindavan, we three boys, along with the patient, would sit separately and many times Bhagavan used to talk to us. Bhagavan would proudly tell others that we were doing a wonderful service, and would say, “Very good boys, very good boys.”
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| Sri Sathya Sai in Trayee Brindavan |
Since it was the last month of stay for us (final year boys) in Brindavan, we decided to ask Bhagavan to grant us an interview. So, the next day I sat along with my class boys, so that we could pray to Bhagavan for an interview as a group. So that day the other two boys were the only ones sitting with the patient, right opposite to the Trayee Brindavan doors. Bhagavan finished His Darshan for the devotees waiting outside and went to the spot where these two boys along with the patient were seated. Bhagavan told everyone there that these boys were taking care of the patient very sincerely and that Bhagavan was very much pleased with them. Bhagavan said that He would take those two boys to Kodaikanal that year. Immediately the Brindavan warden told Bhagavan that I was sitting with the third year boys. Bhagavan said, “Oh! That pakoda; let him be here only.” Of course I did not know anything that was going on since I was sitting at the other extreme. Later on when Bhagavan retired for that morning, I came to know that Bhagavan was going to take the other two students to Kodaikanal but not me. I was deeply pained. I felt that my service did not please Bhagavan. Other negative thoughts were also crossing my mind, giving a feeling that maybe Bhagavan did not know the amount of work that I had done, may be Bhagavan is not God and so on. So there ensued a battle between my positive and negative feelings.
Later on the warden called me and said that I should have sat along with the other two boys and also advised me to ask Bhagavan during the following Darshan that I too be taken to Kodaikanal. I told him that I did not have enough courage to ask Bhagavan in front of everyone during Darshan, but would surely ask Bhagavan if I happened to get Bhagavan alone.
Our usual practice was to take tea for the patient around 3:00 p.m. We would go through Trayee Brindavan to his residence, and then go back for evening Darshan. In those days Bhagavan used to come out for evening Darshan around 4:30 p.m or 5:00 p.m. One such evening I, along with the other two boys, was taking tea for the patient. Just when we were about to pass by the main door, we saw the doors open and Bhagavan came out. There was no one except Bhagavan and the four of us. I ran to Bhagavan, knelt down, caught hold of His hand and asked Him that I also should be taken to Kodaikanal with the others.
Bhagavan listened to me and told me something in Kannada, which I could not understand. I told Bhagavan that I did not understand Kannada. Again, Bhagavan told me in Hindi, which too I did not understand. I was helplessly looking at Bhagavan. Bhagavan told me to take Namaskar and after I took Namaskar, He went inside. Luckily for me one of the boys understood what Bhagavan told in Hindi (he was from Maharashtra). Later on he told me that Bhagavan wanted me to take care of the patient during the summer holidays, as it would be difficult for others to take care of him.
The first thought that came to my mind was that Bhagavan, instead of taking me to Kodaikanal, wanted me not to go home but stay back and do service. I said to myself, “Impossible!” I decided to run away as soon as I finished my last exam. My negative feelings were taking the upper hand in the battle that was going on within me and I was confused. The next day one of my classmates came to me and said, “Sairam! You are indeed very lucky. Bhagavan has so much confidence in you that He feels that the patient will be safe under your care.” Though his words boosted my ego, they pushed me on to the right track. I made up my mind to stay back and take care of the patient.
One day before Bhagavan’s departure to Kodaikanal, Bhagavan summoned all the Kodaikanal boys for an interview in the morning. During the interview He took these three to another room and told them that it would be very difficult for me to take care of the patient alone and that I should take some help from the workers. The message was conveyed to me and to the warden. During the afternoon, one first year student expressed his desire to stay during the holidays to the warden and the warden in turn asked Bhagavan for permission. Immediately Bhagavan said, “Let that boy be with pakoda and help him.”
Bhagavan also informed warden that we both, along with two other boys whom Bhagavan had asked to learn driving, were to sit separately for Padanamaskar. When Bhagavan came out for Darshan to give Padanamaskar to us, He asked me, “When are you going home?” I was confused. I told Bhagavan that I was not going home. Bhagavan said, “If you want to go, you can go.” I said, “Bhagavan, I am staying back.” Bhagavan smiled and walked towards the devotees for Darshan. The next day early in the morning Bhagavan left for Kodaikanal along with the boys.
In the entire hostel we were the only four students and a few teachers, staying back during the summer holidays. Our regular schedule was to go for games after Suprabhatam and prayer in the morning and then would return to the hostel around 7:15 a.m for bath and then we would go to the canteen for breakfast and take breakfast for the patient around 8:00 a.m. Later we would go to the library and then return to the hostel after lunch to supply lunch to the patient around 12:00 p.m. Then we would take some rest in the afternoon and around 4:00 p.m we would once again go to the patient to give him tea or some cool drink and then we would go out for games. Then we would have our Bhajans around 6:30 to 7:00 p.m and then go for dinner. Later, we would bring dinner for the patient at around 8:00 p.m and go to sleep at 9:00 or 9:30 p.m.
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| Sri Sathya Sai Hostel, Brindavan |
But the days were not smooth. From the time Bhagavan left Brindavan the patient was not taking food at all. We tried all means but could not succeed. Finally we wrote a letter to Bhagavan conveying that we were taking food but whether he eats or not, it would be Bhagavan’s concern. That very afternoon when we took food for the patient we found him standing outside his house. He told us that he was very hungry and that we should bring the food soon! From that day on, till Bhagavan returned to Brindavan, we never had any problem in having him take his food.
Our Badminton court was by the side of our library and prayer hall. One evening I was playing inside I found a bird flying in the prayer hall. The next day morning I found the bird again inside the prayer hall, flying from one end to the other. Obviously there was no opening for the bird to go out. I felt pity for the bird and decided to help it go out. I went up to the prayer hall and opened all the windows and tried to chase the bird away. However it would never come down to the windows but would sit on the ventilators. I climbed up the windows and opened all the ventilators except one, which was too tight but the bird would always sit only on that ventilator even after chasing it many times from there. So I decided open that too and I climbed up again and with all my strength pushed the glass pane. There was a terrible noise and I found that the thick glass pane had broken to pieces, almost tearing my thumb away from the palm. The cut was very deep and blood was oozing out profusely. I showed the cut to our librarian and he said that I should immediately rush to the hospital. He tied my wound with a handkerchief. I was taken to the hospital and a few stitches were put and the wound was dressed. I was asked to take a few tablets regularly, and advised not my hand in water, lest it should cause complications.
I was brought back to the hostel. After my breakfast, I wanted to take my medicine. I looked for the medicine and could not find it. However much I searched I could neither find it nor remember where I had placed it. I did not have the courage to ask for the tablets again. So I did not take any medicine.
One morning we went to give breakfast as usual and found that the patient’s house was filled with water. We found that the tap was open in the bathroom and something had blocked the outlet. So the only way to clean the room was to push the water out through the main door. This was a tiring job since the water had to be pushed against the slope. I was not doing it because I could not put my hand in water. The other boy did his best for forty minutes became tired. Saying that Bhagavan had kept me back for doing work and not simply watching someone work, I joined him in clearing the water and prayed that Bhagavan should take care of my wound.
Together we cleaned the house and the wound, along with dressing, was fully drenched in water. I later dried it under the fan. As I did not have any pain, I was playing cricket and badminton normally. A few days before going to the hospital I opened the bandage and found that many of the stitches had opened up and there was a big gap. I filled the gap with Vibhuti that Bhagavan gave me before leaving for Kodaikanal and tied it up with a cloth. I was very afraid as to what the doctor would feel after seeing it.
Luckily for me that day the doctor had forgotten to bring her glasses and she told me that she was as good as blind without her glasses. I helped her in removing the stitches and she asked me whether I had any pain. I told her that I did not have any pain. She told me that I was lucky to have got the big wound healed in a short time. The wound had healed and the gap was filled and the hand appeared normal, except for a scar on that part.
One evening as usual we went to give the patient a cool drink. We found that he had fallen from his chair and a lot of foam was coming out of his mouth. His eyeballs were pulled up and he was unconscious. We applied Vibhuti on his body, rushed him to a hospital in a car. The doctor confirmed that he got a re-attack of paralysis of his left side and he had to be taken to the ‘NIMHAMS’ Hospital in Bangalore. So we decided to return to the hostel and then ring to the hospital for an appointment.
On our way back to the hostel, the patient’s left hand had started to shake vigorously and we could hardly hold him in control. After a few minutes he started to scratch his head with his left hand. We brought him back to the hostel. Though he could use his hands he could not walk. So we carried him into the hostel. After half an hour or so, we found him walking on the corridor! We, as well as the doctor who was attending him at that time, were astonished. We took him home and made him lie down and take rest.
Now the only thing to be cleared was that he should be able to talk. We stayed in his room for an hour or so and I was telling the other student that Bhagavan had cured the patient. How nice it would be if Bhagavan makes him talk too. It does not even matter as to what he would speak. Let him even tell us to get away from there, because then we would know that he could talk too. After a few minutes he got up from the bed, stared at me and told me, “Get away from here and leave me alone.” I ran out of the house feeling happy that Bhagavan had made him talk again. From then onwards, he was keeping good health. He would come to the library and even to the canteen for his food.
Most awaited day arrived. Bhagavan was coming back from Kodaikanal. I was asked to offer a flower and the other boy was to offer Arati as soon as Bhagavan arrived. I was sitting there dreaming that Bhagavan would come rushing to me and tell everyone that I was a great devotee like Bharata who had sacrificed so much for serving God. Bhagavan got down from the car. I knelt down to give the flower with a big smile. Bhagavan turned and walked into Trayee talking something to the warden avoiding me totally. It made me think what great things I had done? In fact it was Bhagavan who had done everything for me, right from keeping one more boy to help me, healing my wound without giving any pain, taking care of the patient who could have been a big problem had he got a paralytic attack. I had not done anything great! I asked to be forgiven and prayed that I would never expect anything in return and serve only as on offering to Bhagavan.
Though I was not physically with Bhagavan in Kodaikanal I could feel Bhagavan’s presence directly in the drama of life as it unfolded.
- S. N. Sai Ram
Alumnus, Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning
Mystical and Sweet are His ways to teach us.
ReplyDeleteMadhuradipate Akhilam Madhuram!!!