If someone asks me about the greatest gift that I received from Swami, I would immediately say ‘His Love’. His life is His message, His love is His message. The thousand mothers’ love of Swami is pure, selfless and infinite. The very form of Swami is enchanting; His smile, bewitching; His speech, spell-binding; His touch, transforming; His actions, loving. No wonder He is described as Karuna Samudra, the infinite ocean of Love and Compassion. The love and compassion of Swami are such that, for Him all are equal, (one may be good or bad). For Him, all are Divyatma Swaroopas (Embodiments of the Divine). This compassionate Lord is so kind that He not only chose me as His student but also guided me through my journey towards Him. With His blessings, I would like to narrate a couple of experiences which were granted by Him during the course of the journey with Him. While the first one describes His love manifested as His Omniscience, the second taught me that He is the doer and we are all His instruments.
|Sailesh Vasa with Sri Sathya Sai|
The first one happened during my undergraduate days when we used to go to Mandir (Sai Kulwant Hall) in lines for His Darshan after the College hours. The seating arrangement in the Mandir was class-wise where every class got an opportunity to sit in the first few rows, right in front of Swami once in a week. And within the class, students would sit in the first row on a first-come-first-serve basis. So we used to rush back every day to Hostel as early as we could after the College hours to grab the front positions in Mandir lines, especially to occupy the 1.1 seat in front of Swami. If the day is good for you, Swami might even call you, accept your letter, may talk to you and even grant Padanamaskar. I used to write a letter and take with me every time my class got the first chance. Even if Swami looks straight at you, it gives us great joy. Particularly, in those days, one particular pattern used to be followed by Swami which I like to call ‘unpredictable’ which always He was and which He is. Swami used to come out and sit on the veranda sometimes and other times He would listen to Bhajans inside Bhajan Hall and go back to Poornachandra (the then residence of Bhagavan). When Swami sometimes avoided sitting outside for giving Darshan, we felt bad as we would lose the golden opportunity of His close proximity. So, when we went to Mandir, the line used to start slowly and pick up speed instantly. We used to run for God, and in doing that, the joy we got was tremendous and we all used to get submerged in His Divine Love just by sitting in front of Him and looking at His Divine form. Indeed, God is Love and Love is God.
On one such day of Mandir lines, it was the turn of our class to go first to Mandir. So I came back from College as early as I could after the last hour, got ready quickly and came out to stand in lines. Fortunately for me, there was only one other boy standing in the queue. So I was happy for I knew that I was going to get the first line in Mandir as I was standing second in the queue. When the lines reached Mandir, I quickly waded across the hall and came to a halt at what I had seen. Out of three places that were reserved for our class, two were occupied by Music College students who sat with a programme card for blessings. I did not get the chance to sit in the first row – a twist in the tale. I was not totally unhappy, but not that happy as well, as I was sitting in the second row. While the second-row people have the chance of being noticed by Bhagavan but the chance of Him looking at me was more if I sat in the first row. As it happened, I sat in the second line and was praying to Swami for any of His Darshan, Sparshan or Sambhashan.
At that time, amidst the prayers one thought was going on in my mind that I should go close to Swami only if He called me directly and not otherwise. That was because, whenever Swami gestured in one direction for someone to come, out of love for Swami, many students used to get up and go to Him. Somehow I did not like to do that. That was the thought going on in my monkey mind. Swami glided through the Vedic chanting and to our good fortune He came and sat on the main dais right away. My prayers now became more intense. After some time Swami was calling students and talking to them. So it was encouraging for me and I could not take my eyes off Him. Swami called the Music College students, saw their card, blessed them and accepted their prayers for a Music Programme in His Divine presence. They were happy and went back to their seats. Then Swami called the boys beside them on both the sides. In between He did gaze at me for a couple of times. My heart was beating faster than ever. Then Swami looked in my direction and gestured with a small nod to come. I knew it was meant for me but being caught in doubt and dilemma I did not get up. But the Music College students who were sitting in front of me got up but were asked by Swami to sit back. I felt really bad. Here Swami was calling me and I noticed but did not dare to get up and go. I thought that I lost the chance. But when thousand mothers’ love is ready to call me, He makes sure that all my inhibitions are lost and prepares me to seek His blessings. Then, the moment came. Swami looked right into my eyes, pointed His finger through the Music College students and asked me to come. Even the ones sitting beside me hushed into my ears that Swami was calling me and pushed me to go near Him.
|Sri Sathya Sai Blessing Sailesh Vasa|
For the first time in my life, I went very close to His physical presence and I did not know what to do and what to ask. Everything happened in a flash, and like a robot I went near Swami with a letter folded in my hands. Swami accepted my letter and blessed me with Padanamaskar. I had my first Sparshan and Sambhashan of Swami. The joy was inexplicable. It meant a lot to all of us and we nourish the feeling that He is always with us. It is kind of a lifetime’s experience and assurance. The omniscient Sai knows every thought that goes through our mind, every word we speak and every action that we perform; He is not just a silent witness, but the one who goes after each one of us, reminding us the truth.
Swami, You chose us irrespective of our malignant, impure thoughts and actions. You have always accepted us the way we are. And You have shared Your Love equivalent to that of thousand mothers’, so that we would accept Your love, transform ourselves into agents of love. My prayer to You, “Oh! Lord, be always with us, guiding and guarding and giving us the strength to be worthy of being called Your instruments. Please bless us to lose ourselves in your Love and Bliss. May our lives become Your message”.
- Sailesh Vasa
Student (2005-2012), Department of Mathematics and Computer Sciences
Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning
Prasanthi Nilayam Campus
Currently, Senior Software Engineer, Global Logic India Pvt. Ltd., Bangalore